Month: August 2013

My Husband Does Not Make Me Happy!

| Chandru Gidwani

In a Relationship Workshop, when a wife was asked " Does your husband make you truly happy?"

The husband was confident that she would say yes because she had never complained to him about anything.

"No, my husband has never made me happy. I am happy!" She replied. " My feeling happy does not depend on him but on me. I am the only one who can create my happiness."

" Some say I cannot be happy because I am sick, because I have no money, because I was insulted by someone, because the weather is too hot, because my kids do not listen to me etc"

"I love life not because my life is easier than other peoples but because I decided to be happy as an individual. I am responsible for my own happiness."

" When I take this responsibility out of my husbands shoulders, I leave him free and this way life is much lighter. That is how I have got a successful relationship through all these years together."

Kabir’s Wise “Dohas” (2 line couplets)

| Chandru Gidwani

— Kabir Dohas

Bura Jo Dekhan Main Chala, Bura Naa Milya Koye
Jo Munn Khoja Apnaa, To Mujhse Bura Naa Koye

Translation

I searched for the crooked, met not a single one
When searched myself, "I" found the crooked one

My Understanding

This doha deals with our perception behavior and tendencies. It has been invariably noticed that we tend to find fault with someone else for our situations and circumstances. Our "I", the ego, always tries to put blame on others. Non-awareness of our own self is the cause of this attitude. Resultantly, we find ourselves being busy in criticizing and condemning others and conveniently term them as crooked or evil.

So Kabir says that instead of finding fault and maligning others, dive deep into your own-self. Amazingly, an honest introspection will reveal that all fault lies with "me" and "my" own perceptions and attitudes. If there is any evil or crookedness, it is in "me". Correcting this and opting for a loving and compassionate attitude will change one’s perceptions and the world will appear wonderful all over again.

Rajender Krishan Visual Art by Simi Nallaseth

Work,Work,Work

| Chandru Gidwani

If you are poor, work. If you are rich, work.
If you are burdened with seemingly heavy responsibilities, work.
If you are happy, continue to work,
Idleness gives you room for doubts and fears.
If sorrow overwhelms you, and loved ones seem not true, work.
If disappointments come, work.
If faith falters and reason fails, just work.
When dreams are shattered, and hopes seem dead, work.
Work with faith.
Work is the greatest material remedy available.
Work will cure both mental and physical afflictions.